Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
