girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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