LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
