Porn is love you can see.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize