Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize