If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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