Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
