Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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