It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
