I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
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My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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