She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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