Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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