there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
