This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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