Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
