I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
