I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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