Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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