wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
