Yo dont text me then not text me
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
