Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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