were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
