Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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