i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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