I smell stomach acid.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
This is the high leading the old right now
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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