Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
