you have to choose: penises or morals?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize