week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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