I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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