Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
