either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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