I think scott just propositioned me for sex
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Randomize
