Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
