Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
