Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
