were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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