Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
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