It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Randomize
