So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
You may now shotgun with the bride
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?