I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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