That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
