I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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