I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
