The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize