he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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