you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
you traded sex for a burrito?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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