I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
high people should be assigned attendants
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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