honey bunches of taint.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
