sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
