I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
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