I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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