Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
